We all know women love confidence in a guy, here’s how to start building yours.

Confidence is one of the most attractive qualities a man can have.  

Women are drawn to men who are sure of themselves, their actions and their appearance.  

But how can you appear more confident to women, especially if you’re feeling nervous or insecure around them?  

Here are 13 tips that can help you boost your confidence and make you more attractive to the ladies. 

1. Confident men dress well and groom themselves 

A well-fitting outfit and nice hair can make a huge difference in how you feel and how you look to women. 

Choose clothes that suit your personality and style, but make sure they actually fit like they’re supposed too. 

Women pay attention to details on men, so the grunge style is going to have to go and this is especially important on dating profiles where they only have a quick snapshot of who you are. 

And so are the untrimmed pubes on your chin.  

If you’re going to rock facial hair it has to at least be manicured, otherwise to the ladies you just look lazy and unkempt. 

Women want a man not a grown boy and if you’re wearing clothes that teenage boys wear, what are you going to look like. 

But when you wear clothes that look good, you feel good. 

And that shows through in everything you do. 

Related: 15 feminine qualities that make her wife material

2. Slow down when you’re talking 

When people get nervous, we talk faster. And with a woman communication is key.

It’s a subconscious thing people do which can make you sound and look nervous. 

Instead slow down your voice and let your tone lower. 

Women love confident and collected men and when you slow your voice, you are making yourself appear calmer. 

Don’t be afraid to take a moment to think before talking. 

A small pause can give you a second to avoid filler words like um and uh, which make you look insecure, and can build anticipation for what you’re going to say. 

Back when I was in politics my speaking coach called it the Power of the Pause. 

When you take a moment in a conversation it resettles everything that was going on and brings everyone to your level. 

It makes you the leader of the conversation and expresses true confidence in yourself and what you’re talking about. 

Related: 15 ways a man can boost his confidence

3. Smile often, but not all the time 

A genuine smile conveys confidence, warmth and positivity towards women. 

It also makes you more approachable and likable. 

You need to practice letting yourself go in social situations and give genuine smiles. 

A woman can instantly read a man’s face and a smile after your eyes meet is an attraction sign to her. 

Be sure to smile when you first greet a woman, but don’t force it or make it too big. 

And don’t hold it for any longer than what feels natural. 

A guy smiling at everyone all the time is creepy. 

But a guy who gives her a genuine smile, walks up and interacts positively shows her that he is a man who is confident in himself as well as approachable and genuine. 

4. Keep steady eye contact with her 

Eye contact is one of the most powerful body language tools a man has that can make or break how women view him. 

Think of the times a woman has locked eyes with you only for your first reaction to look away so you don’t look like a creep who was staring. 

But when you can fight that urge to look away and hold eye contact with her, you signal that you have the confidence to be totally comfortable with her seeing you. 

Just be sure to not start staring at women because then you are being a creep. 

And if you feel uncomfortable with holding eye contact with someone, look at the bridge of their nose. 

They can’t tell you’re not looking in their eyes and it gives you a less stressful target to look at. 

Related: 15 ways a man can become more stoic and more attractive

5. Confident men don’t overthink their actions 

Overthinking leads to anxiety, which leads to stress which leads to more anxiety. 

It’s a stress loop that will make itself worse the more you start thinking about doing something or what you did. 

Instead of going over what you want to say to a woman which makes you sound scripted. 

Just walk up and start talking, and don’t worry about some stupid pick-up line. 

Introduce yourself and if she leads into it at all by introducing herself, start talking like she is an old friend you haven’t seen in years. 

What you talk about doesn’t matter nearly as much as whether or not it’s interesting to you. 

Because if you’re interested and excited about it, she will be able to tell, and passion boost the way women look at a man. 

Related: 15 reasons why women love confident men

6. Learn from other men who are confident and charming 

One of the best ways to learn about being confident in social interactions and especially interacting with women is to observe another man do it. 

When I was in politics I lucked out and had a female confidence and speaking coach which totally changed the way I interact with people. 

But you don’t need to go that far. 

There are professionals just like her that are online, putting videos up, teaching you how to interact in ways that build up your confidence and social skillset. 

And what they all teach are essentially the same set of social skills and techniques that help to boost your internal confidence or increase the way people perceive your self-confidence. 

These are things like your posture, and what you do with your hands when talking. 

And they go as deep as holding eye contact with a single person in a group until you’re done with a statement before moving to address another individually which makes a whole group feel connected and led by you. 

Related: 15 reasons women love stoic men and how you can embrace them

7. Avoid negative people and surround yourself with positive ones 

There is an old adage about men that holds true to almost all of us. 

And that’s, if you look at the 5 closest men in a man’s life, he will be the average. 

And I can’t believe how true this is for me and pretty much every man I have ever known. 

There will be people in your life, some of whom may be old friends, that are dragging you down in life. 

You have to be willing to cut ties with those types of people so that you can replace them with ones that will uplift you into being a better man. 

By surrounding yourself with men you see as better than you, you will lift yourself up. 

Even subconsciously, you will perform better at work, in school, by being around successful men you will learn how to be more successful. 

This was something that hit me in my political years when all the sudden I was at tables eating with CEO’s, senators, and founders of huge organizations.  

And as they got to know me, many took me under their wing so to speak, and introduced me to other people, got me coaches, uplifted me. 

The point is to start surrounding yourself with others who push you to be better and not stagnate. 

Related: Here are the qualities of high-value men that women can’t resist

8. Confident men silence their inner critic  

Men are our own biggest critics. 

It’s true, isn’t it? 

We can go over every detail that we did wrong and hang onto it until it drives us mad. 

But guess what, when you’re criticizing yourself or going over things in your head, it shows to everyone around you. 

But if you truly want to appear and feel more confident, you need to realize that no one pays as much attention to you as you do. 

And no one cares about any of the small stupid things you’re beating yourself up about. 

Once you can shut off that inner voice you will instantly start to notice just how little most people pay attention. 

We’re just too busy most of the time with our own needs, wants, thoughts. 

So stop worrying about the dumb way you phrased something or how stupid your clothes looked yesterday. 

Today you’re a man and you can take on the world standing tall. 

And sometimes you just need to tell yourself that. 

Literally, tell yourself affirmations during times when you’re feeling stressed out. 

Say something like, “I am a confident and intelligent man and these people want to hear what I have to say.” 

Related: 15 most attractive hobbies a man can have

9. Confident men accept themselves for who they are 

A huge part of self confidence is learning to accept and love yourself. 

You don’t need to compare yourself to other people or try to act like someone else. 

Instead, being comfortable in your own skin and with yourself is the foundation of true confidence.’ 

So be proud of your achievements, embrace your uniqueness and accept your flaws as points of growth. 

Part of this is practicing self-care or things that make you healthier and stronger. 

Eating well, exercise and continuously trying to learn and grow will lead you into the practice of constantly becoming a better man. 

And if you grow by just 1% a week, you are always getting better, and that shows through you and to women. 

Related: Here is how to stop being the nice guy and make her attracted

10. Maintain your friendships and don’t depend on your partner for happiness 

One of the major parts of building self-confidence is building a life you are happy with. 

This is especially important when we first meet someone and become infatuated. 

We have that want to be around them but that can cross the line into neediness or clinginess.  

By having your own social circle and hobbies, you are giving yourself a foundation of life to be content and happy with, without the need of someone else to be fulfilling you. 

Having your own hobbies gives you an opportunity to not only unwind, but to seek pleasure with just yourself. 

A man who is comfortable with himself comes across as more confident because they are able to go at it alone, without constant validation from others. 

Related: 11 masculine traits women love in men

11. Remember you are a man, even without a partner, so don’t be needy 

Being clingy is an instant turn off for women because it shows a deep lack of self-confidence and worth. 

But being able to live in your own life gives her room to breathe and start longing for you. 

It shows her that you don’t need her, you want her, and being wanted is something every woman desires. 

Your self-worth isn’t based off the women in your life, it comes from the man you are and the women in your life are based off that. 

Never beg for a woman’s attention or approval because that comes from a lack of confidence, instead be yourself and let her give you that attention. 

So when you build yourself up without needing a woman, you leave that part of your heart and mind open to be truly given to a woman when she does enter your life. 

12. Learn to relax your body and mind 

Nothing shows a man’s confidence like when he is calm, cool, and collected regardless of what’s going on around him. 

A man that can keep his calm even in loud or crazy events is someone who is in control of themselves and their emotions. 

And that comes across as very confident to women. 

Women can see when a man is nervous, it shows in his breathing, his mannerisms, speech and more. 

But if you can learn to take a few moments and breathe deep to relax your body, you will come across as less anxious and more confident. 

A major part of this is body posture.  

Never cross your arms or legs as that is a defense signal.  

Instead try to keep your body open by keeping your feet shoulder width, and your hands at your side or doing something natural like holding a drink. 

Related: 13 ways she can get him to start communicating

13. Develop a positive vibe and attitude 

An optimistic and cheerful man comes across as confident while a pessimist comes across as unconfident. 

Think about it for a moment, if you’re constantly looking for the bad to rain down, you are in a state of fear. 

Or at least that’s what women will see when they see your pessimism. 

While a man who is optimistic comes at the world from the viewpoint of confidence because regardless of what happens, he will overcome and be better for it. 

Women want to feel good, and a man who is positive around them makes them feel that way. 

So be playful, witty, curious and interested. 

Genuinely engage her with positive questions and comments about whatever you’re discussing. 

If she tells you about where she grew up, lead into it positively by asking about her favorite memories. 

And don’t worry about coming across as too assertive, that’s a confidence sign as well. 

Women love a man who they feel can take charge and lead in a situation, even if it’s just a conversation. 

Confidence isn’t something you have or not, it’s learned 

You have to build up your confidence. 

It isn’t something that anyone else can give you. 

And for a man, it comes from building himself up as a man. 

The more you push yourself to be better and fight through the issues holding you back, the stronger you will become and the more it will show in your self-confidence and worth. 

Women can see the confidence a man carries himself with, and that is a very attractive thing because it generally comes from a place of competence within their lives.