Cheating in a marriage won’t happen if you don’t allow it to start in the first place.
Infidelity has numerous causes, excuses and risks that lead to it but the good news is that it can be avoided before it even starts by simply understanding the risks and setting clear boundaries.
Even still cheating is one of the most common and destructive problems that couples face.
It can ruin trust, intimacy, and happiness in a relationship. It can also lead to divorce, separation, or emotional trauma.
But the good news is, infidelity isn’t inevitable or unavoidable. There are ways to prevent it from happening and to protect your marriage from the temptation of an affair.
In this article, we will explore some of the strategies that you can use to stop infidelity before it starts.
Understand the causes and risks of infidelity
The first step to preventing infidelity is to understand what causes it and what factors increase its likelihood.
Cheating isn’t a simple or straightforward phenomenon and it can have many different causes and motivations.
Some of these may come from outside interests or even from not being able to find a proper career/marriage balance.
These can be a variety of different things such as:
- Lack of satisfaction or fulfillment in the current relationship
- Lack of communication or emotional connection with the partner
- Lack of sexual compatibility or variety with the partner
- Boredom, curiosity, or excitement for something new or different
- Stress, depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem
- Addiction, impulsivity, or poor self-control
- Revenge, anger, or resentment toward the partner
- Opportunity, availability, or peer pressure
While these causes do not justify or excuse cheating, they can help you identify the areas that need improvement or attention in your relationship.
They can also help you recognize the warning signs or red flags that indicate that you or your partner may be vulnerable to having an affair.
The risk factors that increase the chances for infidelity are pretty common:
- Spending too much time apart from your partner or too much time with someone else of the opposite sex
- Having a history of cheating or being cheated on in previous relationships
- Having friends or family members who have had affairs or who condone infidelity
- Working in a profession or environment that exposes you to potential partners or temptations
- Having access to social media, dating apps, or online platforms that facilitate affairs
- Having unresolved conflicts, issues, or problems in your relationship
A research study found that cheaters rated their relationship quality as lower across the board than those people who hadn’t ever cheated on someone.
By being aware of these major causes and risks, you can take proactive steps to prevent them from leading to infidelity.
Establish clear boundaries and expectations
The next part of preventing infidelity is to establish clear boundaries and expectations with your partner and with others.
Boundaries are the rules or limits that you set for yourself and your relationship. They define what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior for you and your partner.
Expectations are the hopes or desires that you have for yourself and your relationship and encompass everything you want and need from each other.
By setting boundaries and expectations, you can create a sense of security, trust, and respect in your relationship that works to avoid misunderstandings or conflicts that arise from different assumptions or perspectives.
Some of the common boundaries and expectations that you should discuss with your partner are:
- The definition and meaning of fidelity and infidelity for both of you
- The consequences and implications of cheating for both of you
- The level and frequency of communication and intimacy that you both desire
- The amount and type of interaction that you both allow with other people of the opposite sex
- The degree and mode of transparency and accountability that you both expect
By having these conversations, you can ensure that you and your partner are on the same page and have a mutual agreement about your relationship.
You can also communicate your feelings and needs clearly and listen to your partner’s feelings and needs attentively.
Strengthen your relationship and yourself
Another key to preventing infidelity is to strengthen your relationship and yourself.
Strengthening your relationship means improving its quality and satisfaction by enhancing its positive aspects and reducing its negative aspects.
It’s building your marriage into a strong and cohesive team where you lift each other up.
And to do this you need to be mindful of and pursue intimacy with your partner every day.
Intimacy has to become a habit of your relationship so that the benefits intimacy brings, like increased closeness, stronger bonds can become a part of your relationship.
Strengthening yourself means improving your personal well-being and growth by enhancing your positive traits and reducing your negative traits.
By strengthening your relationship and yourself, you can increase your resilience and resistance to infidelity.
You can also increase your happiness and fulfillment in your relationship.
Follow these easy ways to strengthen your relationship:
- Expressing love and appreciation for each other regularly
- Spending quality time together doing fun and meaningful activities
- Sharing your hopes and dreams with each other and supporting each other’s goals
- Resolving conflicts constructively and respectfully
- Seeking new experiences and challenges together
- Maintaining a healthy balance between individuality and interdependence
- Taking care of your physical health, mental health, spiritual health, and emotional health
- Pursuing your hobbies, interests, passions, and talents
- Seeking help from friends, family members, mentors, counselors, or therapists when needed
By doing these things, you can create a strong bond with your partner and a strong sense of self.
You can resolve any conflicts that may have been creating a wedge between your relationship and instead create a fulfilling and satisfying relationship that meets both of your needs.
Conclusion
Infidelity is a serious threat to any relationship. It can cause immense pain, damage, and loss for both partners.
However, it can also be prevented and avoided by taking some simple and practical steps.
By understanding the causes and risks of infidelity, establishing clear boundaries and expectations, and strengthening your relationship and yourself, you can stop infidelity before it starts and enjoy a faithful and happy marriage.
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